He's just a stupid smiling little flexible kid's toy crossing guard with no hat left and nothing in his right fist for 26 years since Jesse found it in the freebies box at some yard sale and his face lit up as he clutched it to his 2 year old chest and said, "MOMMY! It's Mr. PuddyToddy!" And I find it on the floor this morning and I cry and cry. I will probably be crying most of the day, on and off. And I don't care. Why shouldn't I cry. I will never throw that stupid toy away. I will never forget that on that day, Jesse and I were happy, happy with life and each other, and he had put the soul of one of his three imaginary friends into this little blue wire-boned discarded bit of idiot-faced plastic. And Jesse kept it all these years, so I would find it today and realize that he really did remember.