About the funeral

How his service went:
No clergy, just one of the Fordham deans sharing what the profs thought of him, then his friends and family telling stories about him. Three women from his contracts class said now that he's gone law school won't be fun anymore. (I guess you have to be in law school to get it?).

We wanted to do cards for him, but he's an atheist so we couldn't exactly have Jesus and the Simpsons' clouds. So I found a photo of him at two and a half, running bare-butt away from me toward the lake. For his saying on the back I chose a line from one of his favorite books: "I'll carry you. I'll go from world to world until I find a time and place when you can come awake in safety... And I'll tell your story to my people."

It's not just that I miss him. Whole futures no longer exist. No forgiveness, no plans, no plan B, no chance reunion. No "I will." When you have children, you don't just have people, you have this whole span of their unimagineable tomorrows. Those are gone.